Last week I wrote an Insight piece for the DOCIAsport website as I was about to go on a digital detox retreat with www.unplugged.rest . Just me and Fred the NED. It had been a busy and often challenging few months and I needed to stop and recharge. But I didn’t realise how much recharge I needed. Here are my reflections of those three days digitally unplugged in my cabin ‘Loki’ and some of the thinking I did whilst I was there.
I realised that I needed this break as soon as I got there because I’d left a bag full of my clothes and some of Fred the NED’s dog food behind. But a contingency call sorted that out and as of late afternoon on Wednesday I then went ‘off grid’ until Saturday morning – no phone and no laptop. Part of the kit provided in the cabin is a printed local map showing the area; nearest shop, pub and walks so there was really no excuse to turn the phone back on. I’d got the day’s paper and a couple of books so I didn’t feel anxious about passing the time and I could do what I wanted when I wanted to. No deadlines, no meetings and once Fred had had some food he too was prepared to lean into the next few days. We could relax.
I certainly started the break feeling very tired and over the course of the three days I slept a lot. I’m a ‘morning person’ – which is a good job as Fred is too- and once I’m awake that’s it, but on Thursday and Friday morning I was waking up still with that gritty feeling in my eyes that suggested I was winding down but could do with a bit more shut eye. However, there was a dog that needed ‘emptying’ and walked! The difference in the retreat was I could do something about the sleep, and I did that through meditation and naps when it felt that that’s what I needed to do. The result on Saturday morning was a clarity in my mind and a feeling of the jug being ‘topped up.’
The beauty of not having to be doing something or preparing for something meant that I could be more ‘present’ or in the moment. I realised that this was happening because I became more aware of what was around me and not distracted by the ‘noises’ in my head. Although there are blinds on all the windows in the cabin I chose not to close them, and I loved watching the sunrise and the sunsets seeing the light change and the clouds travel across the sky.
Now there are many things that Mr Fred Braid has taught me during his tenure as the senior NED on my personal board. Being in the moment whenever possible is perhaps the best.
I also ‘had’ some thinking to do and the framework for this was set by some work I’d agreed to do with Richard Husseiny Guiding the Men Behind Sport and a book he’d recommended ‘Stealing Fire’ by Steven Kotler.
The work was around reflecting on what has happened recently, where I feel I’m at right now and what the future might hold. To do this I borrowed the thinking Richard had discovered that was used by an Indigenous South American people. Here’s some of what I wrote in my journal
- A snake.
I’ve shed a skin of poor self-esteem and found more self-confidence. I’m less anxious as a result.
- A jaguar.
Rather than focussing my energy on something particular, I realise that I’ve been using a lot of energy on many things. Admittedly some are of necessity such as find a roof over my head but added together there’s an obvious reason why I’m knackered. Whilst this might not settle down for a while I recognise the power of rest, and this will be factored into my calendar for the next couple of months.
- A hummingbird.
I know where the ‘sweetness’ is, and I have to go to the source to keep the energy up. My family, my legacy, is key as is the friendship and support I have had from some key members of my personal board.
- A condor.
As I soar high on the thermals and look down on where I have come from, the one aspect that strikes me is the shift in my mindset. Twelve months ago I’d say my mind was frozen and that how I felt was my ‘normal’ with everything that went with that. But now, I feel I’ve unlocked a door within me, and I released a flow that is allowing me to feel and express more emotions.
‘Stealing Fire’ is one of the books I’ve read recently at exactly the right time for it to have a sustainable impact. I certainly feel, as I said above, that I have benefitted from an altered state of mind and the book identifies four critical contributory factors to an optimal state of mind what the author describes as ‘ecstasis’.
They are
- Selflessness
- Timelessness
- Effortless
- Richness
I’ll come back to this in more depth, but the text certainly has resonated with me. Whereas my frozen mind was allowing me to keep my head above water, just, I now feel I can have my head above the clouds and go with the flow.
I’m back and back on it. I’m grateful for the rest and the company and support of Fred the NED and look forward to the uncertainty of the future. Bring. It. On.
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